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Stauchy Blog » Blog Archive » Oh, What a Feeling!, Thursday May 31st (LAS)

Oh, What a Feeling!, Thursday May 31st (LAS)

I walked out to ARO with Jason a couple of days ago. I wanted to check out the fire panel for an upcoming radio drill we were planning for emergency response. On the way back we kept looking up at the sky and vast aray of stars. The sky was exceptionally clear again and the Milkey Way was beautiful. For some reason, perhaps from reeling brain cells leftover from my last blog, I started thinking more about how it feels to walk outside while we are here and if I’ll be able to take the “feeling” with me when we go.

The stars were so beautiful. I lifted my goggles to get a better view. I had a small slit of exposed skin between my hat and my gator. I had the hood of big red up, sheltering my face from wind. I wanted to take it off, i wanted to take off the hat and gator and enjoy the vast beauty of the sky. These comforts that kept me warm were impairing my ability to soak it all in. I knew better, of course, and didn’t do it. It, however, made me think about how nice it will be in another 5 months or so to be able to run around in shorts, t-shirts, and sandals and enjoy the warmth of the sun directly on my skin. As i made my way inside and up to my office, i tried to remember the feeling of the sun. I tried to remember the feeling of diving into a relatively warm pool. Swimming has been a big love and a favorite sport for me. The “feelings” - the actual sensory feelings of these activities are somewhat lost on me. It made me realize how the sense of touch (as in one of the 5 primary senses) in many ways requires “updating” for me to maintain the memory of the feelings. How will I take the feelings of trecking around station in big red with me?

In the meantime, Memorial Day weekend has just come and gone in the states. Our family and friends are enjoying the return of the sun and the opening of swimming pools. My neice, Brandy, has been great at sending pics of the family and her kids. It’s great! We love seeing them! There were pictures of my great-nephew, Quint, swimming in a pool. I sent my neice this e-mail and thought there might be interest from some of you:

I can’t imagine swimming right now. Even the thought of it gives me a bit of a chill J — it’s sorta weird how warm sun on bare skin and hot baths are sensory feelings that are in some ways lost on me right now. I was actually thinking about this the other day during a walk back to the station. You are never cold outside – I mean, assuming you are dressed properly, you never get the chills to the core that I usually think about with cold weather. Sometimes, if you are out too long, your fingers and feet will get cold – kinda like you were holding ice to long – but it is localized and your body stays it’s normal temperature…BUT – you wouldn’t go without clothes…and it’s just a little hard to think about warm sun, bright sun, bare skin, swimming outside, long baths – your brain just sort of doesn’t compute them. Kinda weird, huh? I guess it would be like trying to figure out what it would be like to play in snow if it had been a really long time since you did it….or what it feels like to jump in a pile of leaves when you are a kid…you know you experienced it – and you can describe it in words – but it was so long ago, that it is hard to recreate the “feeling”…

So, with all that in mind, I’m taking on a new goal to really focus on the sense of touch and how to be able to understand and maintain some recollection of life here beyond the written word…

-LAS

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2 Responses to “Oh, What a Feeling!, Thursday May 31st (LAS)”

  1. kenlois Says:

    That was neat,,, lynette,,, I am sure proud of you two,, in enjoying a new environment to it’s fullest,,, the comradery of helping each other in small groups,, standing together,,, that is lacking in the more populated environments,,, of looking and sharing with us,, the uniqueness of your adventure,,, as mother would tell me,,, climb every mt.. I am finding that I am depending more and more, on photos to bring back those happy feelings and memories,,, it works,,, thanks for taking the time to write these blogs,,, love l.

  2. Tholo Says:

    Thought I’d put this on the blog, though I sent it in my email to you. The following quote is from “An Anthropologist on Mars” by Oliver Sacks. The book is a series of true cases about people with neurological disorders. This particular story, “The Case of the Colorblind Painter”, is about a guy who had lost his color vision and saw the world only in black and white and shades of gray. Your description above about trying to remember certain things reminded me of the story:

    “He would glare at an orange in a state of rage, trying to force it to resume its true color. He would sit for hours before his dark grey lawn, trying to see it, to remember it, as green….

    Immediately after his accident, and after a year or more thereafter, [he] insisted that he still “knew” colors, knew what was right, what was appropriate, what was beautiful, even if he could no longer visualize them in his mind. But, thereafter, he became somewhat less sure, as if now, unsupported by actual experience or image, his color associations had started to give way. Perhaps such a forgetting–at once physiological and psychological, at once strategic and structural–may have to occur, to some extent, sooner or later, to anyone who is no longer able to experience or imagine, or in anyway to generate, a particular mode of generation.”

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